Healing Blog

Structure is the most essential ingredient a rehabilitation center can offer. I have discussed this with clients, support staff at other treatment facilities and have read research in many addiction studies. All agree that structure is an essential base for recovery. Structure is the opposite of addictive behavior. Addictive behavior is triggered by impulses and irrational urges. The more willing clients become to adhere to a healthy routine, the less amount of time they have to indulge in harmful behaviors.

Enticing clients to engage in structure can be challenging. The addict brain repels any sign of recovery and complains that a routine is too rigid or too lax. Nevertheless we have seen Victorian alumni continue to embrace structure after they leave our facility. They keep a calendar in their phone, a day planner, set alarms and show responsibility and ownerships for their scheduled day. The effectiveness in our schedule can not be better displayed than a client taking accountability for her life. To see the Victorian Schedule please click HERE. 

Demi Lovato on the February issue of Seventeen magazine.

Demil Lovato’s battles with depression, eating disorders and cutting ultimately landed her in rehabilitation last year. The Disney singer and actress took the leap into recovery and came out a strong eating disorder prevention advocate for recovery. Today, I don’t know anyone who isn’t a fan of Demi Lovato! Her authenticity is inspiring and magnetic! She was just named, Favorite Pop Artist at the 2012 People’s Choice Awards. In February 2012 she is due to appear on the cover of Seventeen magazine. Lovato gave the magazine an exclusive interview talking about her dark walk with mental illness. Here is an excerpt of her interview with Seventeen:

“Although I have been on the cover before, I feel like this time it is even more special to me because I am more confident and comfortable in my own skin.  I can now be honest in interviews and show my true self to the readers. This cover is like a fresh start for me. It's a presentation of who I am right now and how I'm working on myself and continue to grow as a person.”

I think I can speak on behalf of everyone in eating disorder recovery when I say that we are so proud of Demi Lovato and the woman she has become and is still becoming. Thank goodness for recovery! 

When someone asks you to Sponsor them it means they see something in your recovery that they want themselves. Therefore I always consider it an honor when a woman asks me to Sponsor her in her eating disorder recovery. Sponsoring requires a commitment of giving time and energy. Over the years I have made some mistakes as a Sponsor. Learning from my mistakes I have learned that setting up the proper foundation and boundaries is pivotal to both my own and my Sponsee’s recovery. Today I’d like to share how I approach the Sponsor/Sponsee relationship.

1^st – Email – I give the Sponsee my email address and ask them to email me what they would like from a sponsor .

2^nd – Coffee – At coffee we discuss the list they have made. I let them know what I can and can not do. For instance, I let them know, “Yes, I can call you back within 48 hours.” I also let them know, no I can not help them with their meal plan.

3^rd – Sponsorship – Once we are on the same page and lay out what we each need and want Sponsorship begins.

Below I have laid out what I require of my Sponsee’s and what I’am willing to give as a Sponsor. I have found these guidelines to be very helpful in the Sponsoring process.

Your Job as a Sponsee

·         WRITE - down what you want in a Sponsor

·         PICK A DATE- and stick to it (*We both establish a date)

·         PICK AN ABSTINENCE- and stick to it (*We both establish an abstinence)

·         WORK- the steps

My Job as a Sponsor

·         I HELP YOU apply the steps to your life

·         MEETING UP- I do not set up regular times to meet with Sponsee’s. When you have worked a step/tradition you call me and we set up a time to meet and work the step/tradition

·         PHONE CALLS – You may want to call in at a certain time and that's fine.  If you need me to call you back then you need to say in your message, “I need you to call me back.” Long voice mails should not be necessary each day.  

If you are going to call me and leave me a message I need you to include:

1.)   Whatever it is you’re struggling with

2.)    Tell me how you are feeling (the emotion)

3.)    Three things you’re grateful for

4.)    What you are doing for someone elses recovery today

·         MY RULES:

1.)     Must go to meetings

2.)     Must work steps

3.)    Must take meds as prescribed

A few years ago The Victorian, Eating Disorder Treatment had the pleasure of working with one exceptionally talented counseling intern, Maggie Baumann. The Victorian clients adored Baumann for her authenticity, insight and strength both in individual counseling and leading group sessions. Years later Baumann has gone on to establish her own counseling practice treating those with eating disorders, dual addictions and trauma therapy. She is also in the process of getting trained in Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) trauma therapy. As well, she has brought light to the eating disorder Pregorexia; the eating disorder which causes a pregnant mother to limit the calories she is giving to herself and her unborn child.

The overwhelming response from those suffering from Pregorexia has led Bauman’s establish a Free Eating Disorder Support Group for women with Pregorexia in Southern California.

Beginning: February 9, 2012

Groups meets weekly: Thursdays • 6:30-7:30 pm

Location: 180 Newport Center Dr., Ste. 270, Newport Beach, CA

Facilitator: Maggie Baumann, MFT

RSVP or for more info: call (949) 439-2607 

or email at Maggie-Baumann@cox.net

Topic of discussion focuses on the impact of eating disorders on pregnant women (and their babies in the womb) and how moms with eating disorders who already have children work towards eating disorder recovery and achieving healthy family relationships.

If you have more questions please feel free to reach out to Maggie Bauman directly. 

Maggie Baumann, MA, MFT
180 Newport Center Dr., Ste. 270
Newport Beach, CA 92660
Tel: (949) 439.2607
www.MaggieBaumann.com

Happy Recovery,

Irvina

www.etsy.com

During the time I worked as Support Staff at the Victorian I met hundreds of different clients. Each were different ages, demographics with different stories and back grounds but, all of them had one thing in common, powerful addictions. Many of the women in their 50’s had been in several treatment facilities. I met women as young as 18 who had been given treatment at 9 different rehabs since the age of 9. For myself, as a staff member it was incredibly discouraging. I can only imagine that as a parent or a loved one with an addiction, this news is devastating.

The only hope I can offer, is that though I have seen many women suffer with an eating disorder for years, I have also seen those same women accumulate years of abstinence. Some of those same women have worked at The Victorian and are able to offer support and hope for those in similar situations.

So the question is, “What is the magic combination that makes someone with an addiction ‘get it’? What makes recovery stick?” The only thing I have seen help women maintain abstinence from an eating disorder is DAILY working on their recovery. The best method I have seen for doing that is the 12 Steps of Overeaters Anonymous. The 12 Step program requires women to incorporate recovery as a part of their lives. As it is said in the Overeaters Anonymous literature. “The addiction to food  and/or absence is it is a spiritual, mental and physical disease which needs to be treated accordingly.” Therefore, being a part of Overeaters Anonymous requires:

·         Attending Meeting weekly

·         Working with a Sponsor

·         Serving others

·         Being authentic and accountable to a group of women who are also in recovery

·         Working on yourself through the 12 Steps

Time and time again I have seen women who thought they “had it this time” and didn’t need any more counseling or 12 step meetings and then lose their recovery due to stress in their life. Recovery is a way of life, I encourage anyone who is searching for the solution to this disease to check out the rooms of Overeaters Anonymous. They also have specific meeting available for Anorexics and Bulimics as well which we take our Victorian client too.

Happy Recovery,

Irvina 

The mixture of Holiday food, family members and nostalgia can brew a strong cocktail that is hard to swallow for anyone, but especially those struggling with an eating disorder. New Year’s Eve is just a couple days away and most of us have big expectations on how to bring in the New Year. For the majority of women it includes a sparkly new dress, a champagne toast, being surrounded by our closest friends and a hot New Year’s kiss! However this pictures is easier staged with a stylist and paid models than with demanding real life friends and places elicit the joy that we expect.

It’s kind of like the perfect Christmas picture where the family sits around the fire, laughing at each others jokes and drinking hot cocoas. This Christmas picture is one we are all familiar with, but very few have actually been in it. Therefore in eating disorder recovery we learn to adjust our picture. We change what we deem, “Picture Perfect” in life and on Christmas and that takes away a lot of the stress off the Holiday and our loved ones.

I suggest we do the same for New Year’s. Forget the New Year’s picture some stylist from Macy’s created years ago in order to sell more dresses and crystal and create your own traditions! Some of the following alternatives are some of my favorite, that I have done the past couple of years.

Game Night + Fire Works – Gather a bunch of friends together and hold a kick-back game night at someone’s house. Watch the countdown to New Year’s on TV in New York and when New Year’s hits go outside and light some sparklers or fire works to celebrate the New Year!

Sober Party’s  - Many of our women are also struggling with alcoholism. Thus a New Year’s surrounded by alcohol isn’t ideal. However, Alcoholics Anonymous holds great sober party’s for young people and older groups  that I have been told are a ton of fun.

New Year’s Day Hiking – My personal favorite is to gather a bunch of friends and go on a New Year’s Day hike! Southern California has the most amazing frontier and we never lack in amazing new trails to enjoy!

New Year’s Open House – Some of my friend’s host this every year and I love it! They open up their house to all of their friends from 11 am to 11pm. They have movies going on their TV’s, old records to listen to, puzzles, games and even some concoctions for those with hangovers to nurse themselves. Everyone enjoys just staying in their PJ’s all day and hanging with the friends they love. Good times!

I hope that this post helped you to think outside the box on the way you celebrate New Year’s this year. Whatever you do, I hope that just like eating disorder recovery that you practice listening to your inner compass and that it leads you into a beautiful and healthy 2012!

Happy Recovery,

Irvina 

Our beloved Program Director, Michelle Smith LVN recently taped a show for  Public Affairs – Joy in Our Town on the Trinity Broadcasting Network.  The topic was eating disorder treatment and prevention.  Michelle was joined by the non-profit Rewrite Beautiful and Robyn Baker, an eating disorder survivor. The women spoke about what causes eating disorders, treatment, prevention and the responsibility of the media. It was an amazing, informative and dynamic show that we’re all very proud of it! The show runs for a half hour. Be sure to check it out!

 Public Affairs – Joy in Our Town

Eating Disorders

January 13^th at 10 am

January 16^th at 8:30 am

January 19^th at 3 am

Actress Demi Lovatto speaks about her eating disorder

Lately it seems as if celebrity eating disorder press releases have been coming out by the dozens. Here is a list of just a few who have confirmed that they have struggled with disordered eating:

·         Ashley Simpson

·         Calista Flockhart

·         Candace Cameron Bure

·         Demi Lovatto

·         Diane Keaton

·         Elton John

·         Jamie-Lynn Sigler 

·         Jane Fonda

·         Jessica Alba

·         Mary Kate Olsen

·         Nicole Richie

·         Paula Abdul

·         Portia De Rossi

·         Tracey Gold

·         Victoria Beckham 

Some might assume that the most fatal mental disease has become the latest Hollywood publicist marketing strategy. Whether or not celebrities are exposing their struggle for profit or recovery there are some very positive things we can learn from their courage to come forward and share.

Awareness - One thing I’m really impressed with is how so many of these starlet’s have stated that they wanted others to know that they are not alone and to get help themselves. Today, over 1/3 of American women struggle with disordered eating in the forms of anorexia, bulimia and compulsive overeating. Talking about this still taboo topic brings awareness to those currently in an eating disorder, just simply saying the disease “eating disorder” can vastly help the public have more awareness and  recognize the disease before it progresses or turns into death.

Boldness – Personally, I share my recovery story on a very public format. Through speaking engagements, workshops, press and blogging. I can confirm that it isn’t always easy to admit on a public forum that I have struggled with body image, confidence and concerns about my looks. There are times that it provokes anxiety in me. But, then I am confronted with the fact that “if I don’t come forward who else will? Who else will help others find recovery?” It’s this question that helps me be bold and share my story. I believe celebrity’s are using their platform of fans and media attention to be bold with their story to help others in recovery. For that, I am completely grateful to them.

Owning It – There is a point in recovery we all come to that either progresses us ahead or keeps us stagnant and that is the dilemma of owning it. I have yet to meet a person who struggles with an eating disorder who is excited to vocalize the pressure they feel to keep in perfect physical appearance and that this disease took over their lives. However, there is something powerful in simply admitting on a daily basis that this is our struggle and for better or for worse we are working on our recovery. It’s in this act of owning it that our own recovery escalates and we are able to not only grow ourselves, but help others grown in their recovery as well.

I’m incredibly impressed and thankful for the many celebrity’s who have come forward to share their recovery story. I hope to see many more in 2012 and in turn see recovery happen for so many others.

Happy Recovery!

Irvina 

When I share about eating disorders with people who haven’t experienced them I wish that I could build empathy for the fact that  this addiction takes over your entire life. A person with an eating disorder is so enthralled in it that they lose touch with reality, forgetting the things they love and enjoy. When I was working at the Victorian it was especially difficult to help the women remember the things they loved, due to depression playing a part in the disease. I often encouraged the women to make a list of 20 things they could do instead of  starving, binging and purging. Their lists were always beautiful variations, showing each women’s gifts and talents. 

Today, the Victorian blog brings you some creative, fun and healthy ideas for your own recovery. Feel free to tweak some of these ideas to better suit your gifting. 

1.)   Beach walks  - If you’re blessed enough to be in Newport Beach like us, the beach is a great place to go for a mellow walk. Take in some vitamin D and enjoying the beautiful ocean

2.)   Bike Rides – We love our boardwalk in Newport Beach! Bike rides down the peninsula are the best! Whether with friends or not a bike ride always gets endorphins flowing!  

3.)    Blogging –Whether it’s commenting on someone else’s creative blog or starting your own, eating disordered women are known to very creative and quick witted writers!

4.) Bubble Bath’s – Fill up the tub, light some candles and soak up some self care surrounded by bubbles!

5.)    Calling friends – Sometimes just checking in to ask a friend“How are you?” Can completely change their day. Many of us have friends who are also struggling with an eating disorder. Giving a random call just to say hello can help someone tremendously.

6.)    Coffee Dates – The Newport locals love Alta Coffee which is just a block down from the Victorian. Bring a book or a friend to a coffee shop and soak in the joyful energy of others caffeine affecianados! Pick the right coffee shop and enjoy some art too!

7.)    Crocheting + Knitting – Such a thearapeutic, rhythmic skill! Make scarves and blankets for the ones you love while you watch your favorite chick flicks!

8.)    Dog Walking – Who doesn’t love pups? Ask your friends that work if you can help them out by walking their pup during the day while their at work!

9.)    Gardening – What woman doesn’t love flowers?! Enjoy flowers every day by staring your own little flower garden! Seeds, dirt, water and a little internet research and you’re green thumb will start to ripen!

10.)   Hiking – I am always in gratitude whenever I am on a hike. Realizing that I am blessed  to be healthy enough to use my body to enjoy the beauty of nature is an incredible feeling. Take some friends with you and make it a day trip!  

11.) Kayaking – Take a friend with you to enjoy the fun! Locally we have the Newport Aquatic Center for all nautical needs!

12.) Jewelry Making – Whether it’s beads or jewels, you can build such an appreciation for jewelry once you try to make it!

13.) Journaling – So therapeutic.

14.) Recovery  Meetings  - I have never left a 12 Step meeting without feeling better than when I entered the room. Meetings are a place of growth and reflection for us all.

15.) Movie Days – Get some movies  and don’t forget your Snuggie and head on over to the couch!

16.) Painting – Whether it’s your bedroom walls, a canvas or your nails, painting is a very cathartic action that gives the painter a calming feeling.

17.) Photography – Cannon, Nikon, Toy camera or disposable, capture the world through your new eyes in recovery.

18.) Reading  - Save some buckaroo’s and check out your local library!

19.) Volunteering – Find a local non-profit that interests you and volunteer with them

20.) Writing - Share your sassy, classy and poignant observations in print

For those who have a family member with an eating disorder you know that just talking about ‘thee’ eating disorder can be challenging. Never the less, trying to purchase a gift for someone in recovery can be a tight rope of difficulty. Therefore your favorite eating disorder recovery blog is here to help!

While working as Support Staff I found it inspiring how many women wanted to wear T-Shirts, bracelet’s and even get tatoos’s symbolizing their eating disorder recovery. The very disease that they once hid under lock, key and piles of lies was now a badge of honor to share their own struggle and hope with others. What better way to celebrate that honor than to give a gift that ‘gives back to eating disorder recovery’?!?!

I have compiled a list of some very artsy, cool and legit products that either a.) Stand for eating disorder recover and/ or b.) Donate a portion of the proceeds of the gift to eating disorder prevention or recovery. Check out the goods here!

Happy Recovery (and Holiday Shopping!)

Irvina 

Let Them Eat Cake Tee

This top is part of the My Body ROCKS Collection.
$5 is donated to benefit eating disorder awareness.

Rewrite Beautiful T-Shirt 

This is one very sweet T-Shirt for eating disorder prevention! For one thing, It's a reversible image that the person wearing can see when looking in the mirror. The words 'Rewrite Beautiful' are across the front reminding the person wearing it that it is up to each and everyone of us to 'Rewrite' what we call 'Beautiful'. American Apparel, gray T-Shirt benefits eating disorder prevention through Street Art Workshops held by the non-profit Rewrite Beautiful.

Dragon Fly Necklace

Dragonflies symbolize strength, courage, happiness and moving past self-created illusions and so much more! If you would like to honor someone you know that battles a disease/disorder or would like to display a beautiful, meaningful and yet discreet badge of your courage and strength, this necklace is for you! Because this Necklace features a Dragonfly, 10% of the purchase price will be donated to NEDA to support and honor Eating Disorder Recovery and Awareness.

Dragonfly Bracelet

This is a hemp macrame bracelet made to show awareness of eating disorders. Whether you are suffering, recovering, recovered or know someone who has, this is a great piece for you. It is made from hemp string and decorated with a metal dragonfly charm and purple and red glass beads. Red symbolizes anorexia and purple symbolizes bulimia. The dragonfly represents both. 

 Anorexia + Bulimia Bracelet

Our blue awareness bracelet features 3 brilliant strands of bright blue lapis lazuli, freshwater pearls, and silver plated beads. Bracelet measures approx 7" and has an adjustable clasp. Silver plated awareness charm measures 1/2" from top to bottom. 

Believe Bracelet

Our blue awareness bracelet features a caged 6mm cobalt blue fiber optic cat's eye bead and silver plated charm (measures 12x23mm). The charm is stamped with your choice of 'Hope', 'Faith', or 'Believe' on both sides. Silver plated double link chain, each link is 9x6mm. Adjustable clasp (silver lobster claw) can extend bracelet to 8". Please specify which charm you would like at checkout, 'Hope', 'Faith', or 'Believe'.

 Lip Conditioner

I was approached by an amazing, smart, kind, beautiful girl named Nikki to create a lip conditioner inspired by a very serious epidemic that she is facing. The complete story & idea was written & inspired by Nikki & her loving dog named Javo (they are in the artwork). Please, see below... 'Princess Nikki & Her Hero Javo the Dog'

Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess who could only see ugliness and fat when she looked in the mirror even though she was thin. She would lock herself in the highest castle tower and obsess over how thick every part of her body was. She would cry every night. Then one day, a stray dog came to the tower base and whined and whined until she came down. The dog gave her big sloppy kisses and told her she was the most beautiful girl in the world and that she should eat because he would be very lonely if she were gone. They became the best of friends, helping each other along in the journey of life and never leaving one another's side. (an edited version of this story appears on the lip conditioner label)

She Decided She was Worth it, Magnet

I can't think of a better lift-yourself-up, confidence-boosting, you-go-girl saying than this one. I want to scream it from the rooftops to myself when I'm feeling crappoo. "You're worth it!" Not worth it like buying a car I can't afford, or spending money on stuff I don't need (ewww, like jewelry?), but worth loving myself. Worth knowing that I'm okay, I'm doing my best and Im' not such a bad person, anyway! That kind of worth it! 

Mosaic Scale

Made to order “Perfect” scale. You pick the colors for glass, bottom and leg finishes. See pictures for option examples from past works. The listing price is the base price. The final price for your special order scale, will depend on the completed mosaic.

 

Rewrite Beautiful Bracelet             

Keep the message going that beauty is found in your actions! Creative + Kind + Strong = Beautiful!                                            

 

 

 

See you in 2012!

You might imagine that in the midst of the exhausting fight to beat an eating disorder one doesn’t have a lot to be thankful for. Rather they are devastated at the circumstances of their disease and the outcome of their life altogether. A struggle for anyone, eating disorder or not is to have an “attitude of gratitude” even in life’s most challenging moments.

Having worked at the Victorian – eating disorder treatment center, I can say it is two things:

1.1.)     A challenging place to work.

2.2.)    A rewarding place to work.

The amount of dedication, intellect and love that is exuded from the staff at the Victorian is quite extraordinary. This Thanksgiving I would like to take a moment to thank those inside the Victorian home for making eating disorder recovery possible in our world.

Clinical Director – Michelle Smith, LVN

Michelle is one of the best Clinical Director’s the Victorian has ever seen. She is personable, intelligent, poised and down to earth. Known to personally pick up clients from the airport and welcome them  to The Victorian, Michelle goes above and beyond to make sure that not only the Victorian clients feel valued, but also that her staff is valued and cared for as well. We are so thankful for Michelle being the leader of the Victorian. She has taken eating disorder recovery to a whole new level that is admired in the field.

Program Manager – Andrea Brokaw

Andrea has brought Neurofeedback into the Victorian this year. Within the first few days at the Victorian the clients get their brainwaves scanned for the purpose of participating in Neurofeedback. This process has made the women better able to understand their emotions and their eating disorder. Andrea innovative and creative therapy has been a blessing to the Victorian.

Case Managers – Joi Prendiville,  Katie Rose Wingert and Susan Bailey

These women have the privilege of working one-on-one with the clients to map out their recovery. Helping the women set goals and achieve them takes tons of mental and physical strength. These women add so much to the recovery of women by being their confidants, cheerleaders and coaches. The Victroian simply would be non-existent without these women.

Nurse – Becky Gordon

Many eating disorder clients are in need of meds to assist them in their recovery. Becky helps the clients find the meds that are appropriate for them. Her professional demeanor and support make her a stand out.

Dietician – Dawn Navarez

Dawn helps the clients reach their recovery goals around food. Dawn is not only the Victorian dietician, but also holds nutrition groups with the women, educating them on food, vitamins and metabolism. Dawn is known to not only be a Dietician, but also a trusted confidant.

Art Therapy - Robin Lamoure, CADAC, MA, ATR

Women with eating disorders are known to sway heavily on the creative side and Robin takes advantage of that interest by holding amazing Art Therapy  sessions. Sessions are always inventive, creative and thought provoking around recovery. Robin creates a safe, non-intrusive way for women to process their emotions good/bad on an inventive level.

Intern  - Jennifer DeVore, MFTi

Eventually the baton will be passed to another generation of healers who passionately care about eating disorder recovery. The Victorian is so thankful for the interest of so many psychology majors, nursing students and new dieticians who want to contribute to our field. Their dedicated work with the Victorian clients will be rewarded in the recovery that happens in the years to come.  

The Victorian Clients

The thing we are daily grateful for is the brave Victorian clients willing to confront their eating disorder. We are humbled by the strength they have to go step into the unknown and discover the women they are without their eating disorder. The willingness of these women constantly amazes us. We are so honored to work alongside them and are incredibly grateful that we get to witness their transformations into confident, strong, successful women they are proud of.

I hope that if you are struggling with an eating disorder this Thanksgiving you would find some gratitude in the vast amount of people in the eating disorder recovery field willing to help you. On behalf of our very thankful Victorian team, we would like to wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving and a Happy Recovery!

Irvina

Whether you’re a Victorian client, parent or still on the journey to find your own eating disorder recovery, you must know that knowledge is power in combating this disease. In honor of the fall weather that is rolling into Southern California we thought we would give you a list of some of our favorite eating disorder recovery books. These books are treasures and have been included in Victorian book clubs, meetings and some are the foundation of our recovery program. Many of the authors are highly accomplished and respected professionals in the eating disorder field. Please take a look at the list and head on over to your local Barnes & Noble or Amazon.com to pick one (or a few) up!

Happy Recovery,

Irvina

 50 Ways to Soothe Yourself Without Food 

By: Psy.D Susan Albers

Anorexics & Bulimics Anonymous: Fellowship & Stories 

By: Faith Farthing

Brave Girl Eating: A Family's Struggle with Anorexia

By: Harriet Brown

Breaking Free from Emotional Eating

By: Geneen Roth

Eating in the Light of the Moon: How Women Can Transform Their Relationship with Food Through Myths, Metaphors, and Storytelling

By: Anita Johns PhD

Gaining – The Truth About Life After an Eating Disorder

By: Aimee Liu

Goodbye Ed, Hello Me: Recover from Your Eating Disorder and Fall in Love with Life

By: Jenni Shaefer

Life Doesn’t Begin 5 pounds from Now

By: Jessica Weiner

Life without ED

By: Jenni Shaefer

Starved – Mercy for Eating Disorders

By: Nancy Alcorn

The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous

 By: Overeaters Anonymous

The Eating Disorder Source Book

By: Carolyn Costin

Thin

By: Grace Bowman

Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia

By:  Marya Hornbacher 

 Why Weight? A Guide to Ending Compulsive Eating 

By: Geneen Roth

 It seems like we say it all the time, but Southern California truly is the best place to be for eating disorder recovery. Not only are the most renown eating disorder therapists and doctors based out of So Cal, but the dozens of treatment facilities and support groups far out number any other place in the world.

 Back in 1985, a few eating disorder professionals gathered and founded the International Association of Eating Disorders Professionals (IAEDP.) Today IAEDP is well recognized for its excellence in providing first-quality education and high-level training standards to an international multidisciplinary group of various healthcare treatment providers and helping professions, who treat the full spectrum of eating disorder issue.

IAEDP has grown to develop regions in Los Angeles, San Diego, New York City and beyond. I have attended the Orange County region meetings and I can attest that the most noted professionals  and leaders in the eating disorder field gather in this group. Kindly, IAEDP would like to invite you to their Winter Fundraising Event. Whether you are a professional, a student, a parent or a survivor wanting to know more about preventing and treating eating disorders this would be a great event to attend and network with others.

SAVE THE DATE!

DECEMBER 3^RD 2011

IAEDP WINTER FUNDRAISING EVENT

“CASINO NIGHT”

 AT THE CHERYL BURKE DANCE STUDIO

LAGUNA NIGUEL, CA

RSVP to RaeEllen Ellis at (626) 696-­9019 or by email at ociaedp@gmail.com

Hope to see you there!

Happy Recovery,

Irvina 

Greenie Marie via www.etsy.com

The News Herald serving Northern Ohio posted an article today with jaw dropping statistics of the rise in eating disorders among children.

“Nationally, hospitalizations for eating disorders have increased with staggering speed. The Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality found a 119 percent increase, between 1999-2006, in hospitalizations for children younger than 12.”

The article goes onto speculate “Have eating disorders really risen in the past 10 years or are we just more aware now and able to properly diagnose?” It is hard to say and I’m not an analyst so I can’t help you there. What I can help you with is preventing eating disorders. Like any addiction, eating disorders have a genetic component making one more susceptible to developing one, yet environment and family dynamics play a large role. We often discuss this with concerned Victorian clients who report their siblings or children showing signs of a developing eating disorder.

In response I have put together some of my own tactics to use with raising a child in order to prevent an eating disorder. Everyone should remember S-M-I-L-E, SMILE! 

S – Speak Slowly

From birth through their teenage years children are learning how to be people by modeling and watching their parents and care givers. If they see their parents complaining about their weight, their wrinkles or overly concerned about the way look in some jeans they are going to complain and hold concern over the same things. Speak slowly before you voice your insecurity’s and also get to know the people who are caring for your children. Do they speak obsessively about their appearance? Asking a potential nanny “How do you feel about your own body image?” Is not an outrageous question these days.

M – Movies

No, the Disney princesses are not to blame for eating disorders, but an over consumption of them may contribute greatly to a girls values. In therapy many eating disorder clients refer to “wanting to be saved out of their eating disorder” and “Waiting for that someone who will make it all better.” When a child is still molding their values the images they see have a lasting impact. Therefore it is very important to show movies and films of strong, independent heroines some of my favorites are Anne of Green Gables or Little Women.

I – Individual

Whether it’s a boy or a girl each kid wants to know that they are special for something. Girls get praised for being “cute” and “beautiful” therefore they try to embody this constantly for praise. Boys get praised for being “Strong” and “tough” therefore they try to embody this constantly. There isn’t anything wrong with being beautiful or strong, but it’s the over emphasis that drives addiction. The children feed of the praise for their self esteem. Considering that beauty and strength are external the praise is very fickle and doesn’t help the child develop a strong sense of self. What does help a child is praise for their individuality such as, “Wow! You are such a good artists!” Or “Wow! You are such a good friend!” or “Wow! You are so smart!” or “Wow! You are so kind!” Every kid is good at something, it’s up to you to show them their individuality which in the long run will make them a confident adult, not an insecure one constantly looking for external affirmation.

L – Like

Again children mimic what we say, making it equally important for us to verbalize what we “Like” about other people. If we show children through our conversations that “I LIKE your new hair!” or “I LIKE your new car” or “I LIKE your new dress” or “I LIKE your new house” Children will also learn to like these things as well. We need to show children that we “LIKE how well Mrs. Simmons loves on her animals.” Or “I really LIKE how Mr. Sanchez donates his dental services to kids who don’t have a dentist.” When kids hear this dialogue they will try to fit the mold of your ‘LIKING’.

E – Excitement

A lot of times children develop an over concern with their looks and body, by parents excitement. Does this sound familiar, “Wow! You look so beautiful!” or “Wow! You look so handsome!” There is nothing wrong with this, but try to show the same about of excitement around their creativity, kindness and strength. Children need to know that their value lies not simply in their external appearance, but in how they are each uniquely made.

I hope these tips helped anyone currently worried about the children in their lives developing eating disorders. Check back at The Victorian Recovery Blog next week for more news, research and tips on eating disorders!

Happy Recovery,

Irvina

*Note:  Irvina Kanarek is not a counselor, mother or psychologist. Her tactics are from her experience working in an eating disorder treatment center, as a nanny and art teacher .

Model Katie Halchishick started an online firestorm last week as she became a human diagram of what she would have to go through to get the 'perfect' Barbie body via plastic surgery. In the latest issue of O Magazine, Posing for photographer Matthew Rolston, her glamorous, Marilyn Monroe-type features are surgically outlined according to Barbie's proportions. Several eating disorder treatment centers, non-profits and prevention groups posted the article online. Many commenters applauded Halchischick and the attention she was bringing to the ludicrousness of Barbie’s figure being marketed to young girls. Though I think Halchishick’s picture is quite a conversation starter I wonder how that image will help anyone who is actively struggling with an eating disorder?  When you are in the middle of the throws of an eating disorder it takes a team of counselors, support staff, clinicians, dietitians and doctor’s to help bring the client back to rationalized thinking and a healthy body weight.

I thought it might be helpful for some readers to understand that Halchishick’s image is great for preventative purposes, but eating disorder treatment is a whole different ball game. Here is a sample of Victorian classes around body image:

Body Image Group

This group is led by a professional counselor. The subject of body image, media, family dynamics, hopes, dreams and fears  is the focus. Developing a connection to body parts and their functions is central to this group.

Feelings Group

This group is led by a Victorian Support Staff member. Held after every meal , the clients are encouraged to share how they feel after eating a meal. How they liked the meal and how they rate their emotions afterward. The purpose of this group is to allow the clients to identify any emotions the food is triggering them to think/feel.

Spirituality Group

The group is led by a professional counselor. The group  encourages the clients to build a connection to a higher power. It is proven that a connection to a higher power helps clients attain eating disorder recovery faster and longer.

Psycho Drama & Play

This group is led by a professional counselor. The client’s are encouraged to act out their emotions around their eating disorder. This method helps them to authentically get in touch with their pain and communicate it to a group of supportive individuals advocating for their recovery.

Art Therapy

This group is led by a professional Art Therapist. The clients are given new projects each week, either unmasking their hidden emotions of pain and anger through the art or revealing who they truly want to become. Art Therapy is one of the most beloved counseling groups we hold at The Victorian.

This is just a sample of some of the treatment offered at The Victorian. If you are currently struggling with an eating disorder we suggest you seen help immediately.

Happy Recovery,

Irvina 

The National Eating Disorder Association, based out of New York, New York exists to advocate for research, treatment and prevention of eating disorders. This Saturday, October 15, 2011 N.E.D.A. will be holding a charity benefit at Grauman’s Chinese Theatre in Los Angeles, featuring a screening of Ides of March, starring George Clooney and Ryan Gosling.

To purchase tickets, please visit the following link:

http://neda.nationaleatingdisorders.org/site/Calendar/716403283?view=Detail&id=100481

Happy Recovery!

Irvina 

If you have ever sought professional help for your eating disorder you know how difficult it can be to get your health insurance to cover it. The reason for this is that many health insurers do not acknowledge eating disorders as a mental illness. This is of course ludicrous considering the studies that have been done proving that eating disorders are indeed an addiction much like alcoholism and drugs (which are covered by health care providers for intensive in patient treatment.) Due to this dismissal of eating disorders as a mental illness, many of those struggling with eating disorders never receive treatment; leaving their disease to get worse which results in fatality.

Thankfully a group of eating disorder professionals, therapists, survivors and legislators have gathered together and formed the F.R.E.E.D. Act which is advocating for the government to take a look at eating disorders in the following ways:

Summary of the FREED Act (H.R. 1193)

The EDC worked with Members of Congress to conceptualize and draft the Federal Response

to Eliminate Eating Disorders (the FREED Act), which is a comprehensive bill on eating disorders addressing research, treatment, education and prevention. The bill addresses the

following:

Research Initiatives

• Know the numbers through a national data base and other initiatives.  Determine the prevalence, incidence, and correlates of all eating disorders (anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, binge eating disorder and eating disorder not otherwise specified).

• Know the death rates.  Determine the morbidity and mortality rates associated with all eating disorders and provide a public report of this data annually.

• Know the costs or “economic burden” of eating disorders. Undertake the necessary investigations to conduct an economic analysis of the costs of eating disorders in the United States, including years of productive life lost, missed days of work, reduced work productivity, costs of medical/psychiatric treatment, prescriptions medications, hospitalizations, costs of medical and psychiatric comorbidities, (cost to family, cost to society) etc. 

For all Health Professionals. 

Train and healed days of work, reduced work productivity, costs of medical/psychiatric treatment, prescriptions medications, hospitalizations, costs of medical and psychiatric comorbidities, (cost to family, cost to society) etc.

• Establish Centers of Excellence.  Develop an integrated system of Centers of Excellence for eating disorders, which will provide training opportunities for research, fund research programs, and coordinate the development of a research infrastructure nationwide.  Access to Adequate and Appropriate Treatment.

• All Americans with eating disorders deserve access to care.  Any insurer that provides health coverage for physical illness must provide coverage for eating disorders.

• Care according to universally accepted criteria. Insurers are to follow standards of care as written in the Practice Guidelines for the Treatment of Patients with Eating Disorders by the American Psychiatric Association. The treatment setting must be appropriate to the patient’s needs and clinical presentation. Decisions regarding the treatment setting must include individual variables such as age, sex, ability to manage severity or comorbidity, family involvement, and staff expertise and training.

• Eating Disorders are complex conditions and require comprehensive treatment approaches. All treatment modalities should be covered, including but not limited to family, individual and group therapies, nutrition counseling, psychopharmacology, body Image therapy, and medical treatment.

Education & Prevention Initiatives

• Study mandatory BMI reporting in school. Determine the outcome of measuring BMI in schools and reporting the results to parents (including measuring eating disorders symptoms, and incidence of teasing or bullying based on body size).

• Grant Program of the Education and Training for all Health Professionals.  Train health professionals, to identify, prevent, appropriately treat and address the complications of eating disorders (using a team approach).

• Grant Program for the Education and Training for School/Higher Education Professionals. Train education professionals in evidence-based education programs about eating disorders, education professionals include teachers, professors, school nurses, school aides, community liaisons, cooks, dieticians, social workers, counselors, coaches, athletic departments, and other.

• Educating the public through Public Service Announcements (PSA's). Use PSAs to educate the public on types and the seriousness of (prevalence, comorbidities, health consequences –both physical and mental) eating disorders, how to obtain help, discrimination and bullying based on mental illness, body size, and the effects of media on self esteem and body image.

• Bring eating disorders into already existing obesity initiatives.  Federally funded campaigns to fight obesity should also address eating disorders. Federal studies should include eating disorder related questions.

The lobbying starts on Tuesdsay, October 4th in Washington D.C. We wish all the advocates success and blessings in getting the F.R.E.E.D. Act heard! If you would like to know more about getting involved with the F.R.E.E.D. act please check out the following link: 

http://www.eatingdisorderscoalition.org/LobbyDayOctober2011.htm

Happy Recovery!

Irvina

The last step, the 12^th Step is to “Carry on the message of Overeater Anonymous ” which means sponsoring another women in her eating disorder recovery. The struggle in sponsoring is that as people who struggle with addictions we have a hard time establishing boundaries. That’s why it’s important to establish a healthy Sponsor/Sponsee relationship in the beginning by asking your Sponsee to show you their level of commitment. A lot of sponsors say, “If a Sponsee can’t take simple direction in the beginning, they aren’t ready to be sponsored.” Here are some ideas of homework assignments for your sponsee’s to see if they can take your simple direction and do these assignments. These assignments also help you to gather information about your sponsee so you can be a better Sponsor.

What do you want from a Sponsor?

Ask your Sponsee to make a list of 10 things they want from a Sponsor, for example:

1.1.  Return’s my phone calls within 24 hours

2.2.  Eats meals with me

3.3. Hangs out with me

4.4. Works steps with me

5.5.   …..

Once they have created this list you can go over it with them. You can say, “I am a very busy person, I can’t promise to return your call in 24 hours, but I can do 48 hours.” Or, “I would love to hang out with you, but I like to keep my Sponsor/Sponsee relationships professional, I have found I can’t be ‘friends’ with my Sponsees because it makes things confusing.” This list helps to keep everyone on the same page as far as expectations from one another.

Big Book, The Doctor’s Opinion

In the Big Book there is a chapter called the “The Doctor’s Opinion” which states why alcoholism is truly an addiction. In Overeaters Anonymous we too believe that Overeating is an addiction. Having our sponsee’s read this chapter and truly grasp that their eating disorder is a disease helps them surrender their disease to their higher power as well as help with their willingness to work with a sponsor and take direction.

Want Ad for God

In the 12 Steps we discover a “God of our own understanding.” Many of us have grown up with judging, critical, mean and demanding God. In the 12 Steps we are encouraged to imagine a God that we would like to have a relationship with. A God we could feel safe sharing our hopes, dreams, fears, successes and struggles with.

Having our Sponsees create this “Want Ad” as if they lost their God and needed to find him/her/it, what would the characteristics they would be known by? Have your Sponsee created this Want Ad and share it with you. This Want Ad will help you as you work with your Sponsee when they struggle with their life’s direction. You can ask them, “What would your God say to that?”

Check-in

How often would you like your Sponsee to check-in with you? My sponsor asks that I call her at least 5 days a week and tell her how I am feeling, 5 things I am grateful for and 1 thing I am doing for someone else’s recovery today.  Some Sponsor’s ask that their Sponsee’s check-in like this so the Sponsee can learn to commit to something and know that their life is accountable to someone else. Checking-in also helps a Sponsor knows what’s going on in the Sponsee’s life and can help manage life and issues as they come up, not just when something huge comes up. If check-ins aren’t regular Sponsee’s can slip back into old patterns. Check-ins are good things!

Steps

This is the main reason why people get Sponsors, to walk them through the 12 Steps of Overeaters Anonymous or Anorexics & Bulimics Anonymous. Meeting at a coffee shop or in the privacy of someone’s home the Sponsor and Sponsee are able to discuss these steps and how to apply them to the sponsee’s life.  

Abstinence

Eventually the Sponsor and Sponsee should establish what the Sponsee’s abstinence looks like. Does the sponsee want to eat 3 meals and 3 snacks a day? 3 meals a day? Or is a wide abstinence of no binging and no starving? Everyone is free to choose an abstinence that works for them and their recovery, but both the Sponsor and Sponsee need to be on the same page of what that abstinence is so that the Sponsor can keep the Sponsee accountable for it.

Abstinence Date

There is a saying that goes, “You pick a date and you stick to it!” A Sponsor needs to know when their Sponsees Abstinence Date is so they can keep the Sponsee accountable to that date, cheer them on in accumulating more days of abstinence and also work appropriately with the Sponsee. A Sponsor works differently with a Sponsee who has 6 months of abstinence verses one who have 6 years of abstinence.

Whether you apply some or all of these tools to your Sponsoring program, I hope you know what a service you are doing to eating disorder recovery. Thank you for dedicating your time to the recovery of others and helping to restore our society to the healthy, prosperous, beautiful place it was intended to be.

Happy Recovery,

Irvina